Perfectionism.

I have a confession to make.

Lately--and by lately, I mean the last six months or better--I haven't been practicing what I preach. I've fallen pretty far off the wagon in terms of exercise and eating right. In the past few months, I've even stay away from my yoga mat. I could give you a laundry list of excuses: stress, finishing up grad school, moving, traveling, figuring out what was going to happen with my long-distance relationship, etc. However, I think I may have stumbled upon the real reason (with some help from my very smart significant other): perfectionism.

I thought that if I didn't have an hour every day to spend in the gym and if every meal wasn't a salad, then I wouldn't bother doing anything. Yes, me. The one who lost a bunch of weight and went insane for yoga and had a love affair with spinning classes. That girl. I was totally focused on dieting and working out like crazy instead of focusing on being heathly and living an active lifestyle.

The truth is that at my lowest weight, I was obsessing over every 0.2 pounds, which, let's be honest, is the equivalent of about three sips of water. I was avoiding going out to dinner with friends so I could stay at home and eat low calorie frozen meals. I was working out for hours a day. I was eating low fat and no fat "food" that was low in points. I was berating myself any week that I didn't lose weight. So I stopped. I had enough of the head games and I stopped.

The problem is that I stopped completely. And it shows in many ways.

Last night I went to the gym. I stayed for 50 minutes--35 minutes of cardio and 15 minutes of strength training. I've been eating a fairly normal diet and trying to stay away from sugary foods. I want to ease back into an active, healthy lifestyle one step at a time. To be honest, some of those steps may include canceling my gym and Weight Watchers memberships. I am not sure where I stand on those at the moment. This may also include staying away from my scale for the time being.

I need to adopt these habits on my own without putting myself into a really bad place mentally. I feel grateful for being able to recognize both my own obsessive bad habits and also what caused them. It feels good to fess up to them too. Failure is feedback. It wasn't working for me, even if the scale was saying I was weighing less and less. I'll take healthy over skinny any day.


{Photo credit: D Sharon Pruitt}

Making the time.

"If we don't have time to be sick, then we have to make time to be healthy."~Colleen Patrick-Goudreau

Hearing this really struck me. Until the snow came, I was running around like crazy. I was doing things for work or school and putting myself on the back burner. When it comes to "Should I write this paper that is due tomorrow or should I go to yoga?", well, the papers were winning. I know I can make the time if I manage my time better and organize myself, so I am writing this here so I actually do it! Here are the things I must commit to and make time for so that my health (and mind) doesn't start to fall apart:

-Yoga: I have found that I need at least two yoga classes a week to stay sane. A daily smaller at-home practice helps.

-Exercise: At least three times a week, preferably more, keeps my mind clear.

-Cooking for myself with fresh ingredients. I notice a huge difference in my mood and energy levels when I eat at restaurants or eat a lot of packaged food.

-Vitamins/supplements: Again, I notice a big difference when I take them.

-Tea. It soothes and calms me. Also keeps me from eating too much junk!

-Journaling: Helps me notice patterns, wants, etc. Stream of consciousness type writing is best for me, I find, but I also need to make time for more structured writing.

-Sleep! I have to have 7-8 hours or none of the above (plus work and class) would ever happen!

{Photo credit: Pink Sherbert Photography}

Yoga clothes in the workplace?

Would you wear your yoga clothes to work?

This article in the Chicago Tribune, "Workout Wear Goes to Work", highlights new workout clothes, particularly yoga wear, that women are wearing to the office.

I have to be honest. When I go to yoga I leave far too sweaty to go anywhere other than maybe a quick trip to the grocery store. I definitely will wear yoga inspired clothes to the office, such as my TranquiliT skirt dress with a cardigan or a cardishawl. However, I tend to wear black pants with a t-shirt or tank to yoga or the gym. Definitely NOT work appropriate!

My office is moving to a new space in the coming months that is complete with a large gym but while it might be tempting to workout and then head right to work, I just don't think that will ever be a realistic possibility for me. I am of the mind that if you work out and aren't sweating, you probably aren't working out hard enough!

Would you or do you wear workout or yoga clothes to the office?

{Image via lululemon athletica}

Words to Grow By.

"Keeping your body healthy is an expression of gratitude to the whole cosmos--the trees, the clouds, everything."

~Thich Nhat Hanh

{Photo credit: lululemon}

New Season of The Biggest Loser.

"Unless you faint, puke or die, keep walking."~Jillian Michaels

"The Biggest Loser" is back....in a BIG way!

This season's contestants are the largest yet. And while I am not a fan of the extended infomercial that is each episode (seriously, cut out the product advertising and it could be a 30 minute show!) and I am not a fan of the wrong idea it gives to the many people watching that need to lose weight (19 pounds is not doable in a week if you also have a life AND probably not exactly healthy), I still watch. There are some things I do like about this show:

1. If it encourages even one person to get off their couch and into the gym or convinces them to count calories or do something to improve their life, then I think it's a good thing.

2. The theme of the season is second chances and I love it. I love that Abby, a woman who tragically lost her husband and two children in a car accident, will most likely end up in an entirely new place mentally and physically by the end of the show. I love that Daniel is back to prove to the world that sometimes you do slip up and you do need a second chance to get to a goal weight.

3. This season seems to be a lot more about teamwork and less about the competition itself (though I'm sure that will come through later when some of them starting thinking about the cash!). I love that both trainers are working with everyone and that the teams are not made up of relatives or friends. So far the players seem to be mostly encouraging each other and not being snarky. (I said for the most part--obviously Julio needs to continue to prove himself or he is going to be voted off the island sooner rather than later.)

4. I love see the personalities and the drive of the contestants, as well as watching them grapple with whatever got them to being so overweight. This is probably the main reason that I love Shay. Like I said on Twitter last night, I am squarely on Team Shay (with a side of Daniel).

5. I love the motivation it gives me. I woke up this morning and wanted to stay in bed. Really, really wanted to stay in bed. But you know what? If Shay can weigh around 475 lbs and spend her entire day working out, then I can get my butt out of bed and go run for 45 minutes. And that's exactly what I did.

6. And lastly, while I think Jillian Michaels is the scariest thing to ever happen to television, I appreciate that she can make even the strongest person tremble with fear and cry like a baby. As well as force them to go well beyond what they thought they were physically capable of.

Happy September!

September is here! Finally!

My favorite month has arrived and these past two days in Washington, DC have actually felt like autumn. I can't wait for the leaves of the few trees we have here to change colors. I want to paint pumpkins and drink apple cider. One day I will live somewhere that has a more pronounced fall than the one we have here and I will love every second of it!

My graduate school classes start back up again tonight. They are a reminder of the structure that I crave in my life and that naturally starts to set in with the new school year. That said, here are my humble goals for this month:

-Stay on top of my reading for class. Program "study time" into my Planner Pad.
-Work out or do yoga at least 5 days a week.
-Eat healthy and hopefully lose between 5 and 10 lbs
-After a procedure I am having done on my legs on September 18th where I can't work out for a week, still get on the treadmill and do some doctor-approved walking.
-Do a lot of journaling, especially as it gets closer to Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, particularly around the topics of renewal and forgiveness.
-Study up on advanced Spanish grammar so I can pass my oral exit exam for school.

{Photo credit: algo}

Regular Yoga Practice Can Lead to Decreased Obesity

The Skinny has a post about a recent study shows that a regular yoga practice can lead to a decrease in obesity, something that I have seen to be true in my own life.

The study, which was a follow-up to another study done a few years back, confirms claims that yogis are more mindful of what they are eating because they have better body awareness. This leads them to be more in tune to their body's hunger and saiety levels.

"In our earlier study, we found that middle-age people who practice yoga gained less weight over a 10-year period than those who did not. This was independent of physical activity and dietary patterns. We hypothesized that mindfulness – a skill learned either directly or indirectly through yoga – could affect eating behavior," said Dr. Alan Kristal, associate head of the Cancer Prevention Program in the Public Health Sciences Division at the Hutchinson Center. "These findings fit with our hypothesis that yoga increases mindfulness in eating and leads to less weight gain over time, independent of the physical activity aspect of yoga practice," he added.

Yet another good excuse to get your yoga on!

Is Yoga Enough?

Yesterday I came across an interesting article on the Yoga Journal website: Is Yoga Enough to Keep You Fit?

I try to do some form of cardio and strength training in addition to yoga. I find that I lose more weight, eat better and feel better when I practice yoga more than I do other forms of exercise but I have never given up everything else altogether. It could be the sometimes intense sun salutations. It could be the sense of mindfulness that extends off-the-mat. It could be reduced levels of stress.

I get so many things from my yoga practice but I get different (and important) things from other types of exercise. Would you give up other ways of staying fit and only do yoga?

Chasing the wagon.

I've fallen off the wagon.  In fact, the wagon has taken off and left me standing alone on the corner. 

I need to get back into a routine of healthy eating and a regular workout routine.  Class and work, a killer final and some travel really put a dent in some of the progress I was making.  A few weeks of not being totally vigilant makes me feel like I am slipping back into my pre-weight loss habits forever.  It is the sense of a loss of self-control that is most scary, even though I know I have come so far and I know that I can do this.

In order to get back on track, I have done the following:

-Grocery shopped and stocked my kitchen with fresh fruits, veggies and whole grains.

-Tested out a few new healthy recipes.

-Set up a workout schedule.

- Made a commitment to pack up my gym stuff the night before.  None of the lame excuse of "but I don't have time to pack up my stuff in the morning!"

-Purchased a few new workout DVDs for the days when I don't want to go to the gym.

-Wrote a few journal entries on my eating habits as of late,  how I plan to get back to basics and listed a few realistic goals so I can measure my success.

-Planned to get to bed early.

{Photo credit: epidemic photography}

Workout DVDs.

Do you do workout DVDs?

I was going to go to the gym tonight but when I got out of the metro by my apartment, the sky had opened up and it was pouring, thundering and lightening.  I decided to stay in and give Jillian Michaels' "30 Day Shred" a try.

I purchased this DVD a long time ago at the recommendation of lots of Weight Watchers members but I had never done it.  In fact, I haven't done a workout DVD since I started my shape up plan nearly two years ago and was too embarrassed to step foot in a gym.  I traded the DVDs in for the eliptical and weight machines a very long time ago.  But this one.....  Oh. my. god. 

 I did level 1, which is only 20 minutes long, and I was dying.  Granted I did it with 8 lb hand weights and I probably should have done it with 5 lb weights.  I am way more out of shape than I thought! I have met my match.  This could be a great morning workout (each level is only 20 minutes) to complement yoga or spinning at night.  I'm hoping that if I keep up with it,  I just might be able to do one real push-up sooner rather than later (all those chaturangas and I still can't do a real push-up!)

If her other DVDs are as good as this one, I think I need them all!  

Bikes!

I remembered how much I like bike riding in Florida this past weekend.  I really, really, really want this awesome pale yellow Trek cruiser.  Really, really.  It comes in a pink, which I would want if it were the bright pink I like and not icky baby shower pink.  So next in line is this cute yellow one.  Now if only I weren't so poor.