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Did anyone else catch the premiere of Fox's new reality show, "More to Love"? It's like "The Bachelor", only with curvier contestants. The guy, Luke, is a 26 year-old successful real estate agent looking "to settle down". And, in case you were wondering, Fox wants to remind you a million times that he is 6'3 and 300 lbs. Twenty average-size women are competing for his affection.
Yes, America: a size 14 is average. Deal with it.
My first gripe: WHY must you list the contestants' heights and weights as they are being introduced? I have never seen "The Bachelor" but I am guessing they don't do that.
Second: I am also guessing that no one on "The Bachelor" talks about how her weight makes her feel unlovable and unable to get a date.
Third: I am also betting that the Bachelor himself does not tell all of the contestants that they have nice eyes.
I have always been super self-conscious about my weight. I still am. I know that it has affected my dating life. As recently as two weekends ago I overheard someone ask why Jesse was with someone like me. And sure, it hurts. But my size--ANYONE'S size--does not mean I am not worthy of love. It doesn't make me less deserving of happiness. And, like one of the contestant's remarked, it doesn't mean I don't take care of myself. Some people were never meant to be a size 2. And I thought that this show, at least the first episode, reduced each of these women to the number on the scale and not who they really are. The worst part? I bet it got high ratings.
10 comments:
Ugh, what an icky show! I hadn't heard of it until now, but now I know to avoid it. The other disturbing thing about it is that, from your description, it seems to imply that heavier/curvier people can only love or be loved by other heavier/curvier people...that they are somehow in a category of their own when it comes to dating. And whoever made that comment about you and Jesse sounds like they're just jealous of your happiness!
I agree with Analiese :(
I am sorry someone made that comment about you and Jesse but what matters is that you guys are together and happy and you both take good care of yourself and each other.
Oh, my God, Lauren. People are so ignorant and so deeply unhappy...
You are such a beautiful girl -- inside AND out.
Amazing.
And, yes, health is more than size. How do we stop doing this to ourselves!?!?!?
I do it. I was just talking about how I have to HURRY UP and GET IN BETTER shape before my yoga training in October.
WHAT!?
How easy it is to drown in the negative...
wow, i don't even know what to say. it's shows like this that make me solidify me not having cable!! you are right about reducing people down to a number (their weight). it's bull shit! i too am self conscious about my weight (and i think at some point all women, no matter their size, are to some degree - i think it's our society's fault - i mean just look at the stick figures in magazines, etc!!) i'm really sorry to hear about what that person said to jesse. people can be so judgmental towards other people when i think that they are really just unhappy with themselves and project that onto other people. anyways, i'll stop the rant now :) hugs to you my friend!!
Lauren, I *LOVE* you even more for writing this post! You are so, SO right, and I agree with what the others said. Thank you for writing this. It's something I'm struggling with right now, and I definitely needed to see this.
xoxo,
C
This is why I abstain from watching television.
What a thoughtful, and thought-provoking, review. Thanks, Lauren!
I haven't seen the show as I generally don't enjoy that type of show, stick people or size 14. I just finished taking a beginners class in belly dancing and I found it amazing. Of course there were a few slim women but most of us were average body types and several were larger women, but it didn't matter. We had fun, and we moved our bodies in a sensual dance and weren't embarrassed or ashamed. If our bellies jiggled and our boobs went North and South it didn't matter...we had a good time...a freeing time!
As a naturally thin person, I dislike it very much when shows like these make it seem like people like myself are not "normal" for being the weight they happen to be. I just hate how these shows have one version for the skinny, slutty, idiotic girls, and one for the "normal" people (aka: nice, normal girls, who happen to be heavier). I guess it bothers me because I don't DO anything to be thin, I just am, and I don't think that makes me a freak or not "normal." I think we reduce everyone down to their size, whether its a low or high number on the scale. I used to be seriously underweight as a child/teenager, and other girls would literally argue about which eating disorder I had in front of me! Thats no better than calling someone fat in my opinion!
Thanks, everyone, for your comments! I'm so glad that this post inspired so many people to write their thoughts!
I am so glad this show has not made it to Britain, and I sincerely hope it never will. It saddens me that this type of show can even get made. But what saddens me more is that people are rude and judgmental enough to make the sort of comment they did.
We know why Jesse is with a girl like you: because you are a wonderful writer, a seeker of creativity, a inspiration to those around you (like us!), a devoted student of Latin America, a regular yogini, and an aspiring freelance writer. You rock!
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